Lyra's Love
by Ary-Gryphyn
Summary: Lyra Black was not normal. Her brother was not normal. Her life was a giant revolving wheel around abnormal. On her sixteenth birthday, she's leaving. Where? That's the question nobody knows the answer too, save her parents. And Sirius. But with a bond steadily growing with someone very dear to her, will she be able to leave now? Or will she have to stand and fight? Remus/OC
1. Prologue

I've always tried to avoid my brother and his friends during the school year, didn't want to scare away the only people Sirius actually loved like family. Other than me, of course. And it was always easy for me to do, even though Sirius told me that it didn't matter if I spoke to them or not. I'd scare them off, and I'd regret it so much if I did that to Sirius.

But by the time fifth year came around, and I had hit my fiftieth birthday, I felt like I was compelled to talk to them. And, why's that happening? I have one year left to live a semi-normal life. I can't start suddenly wanting to make friends and then have to leave them. I couldn't handle that. I'm already going to have to leave my studies, and my brothers, and my parents... And it was going to hurt me so much.

No matter how much they dislike me, I still love them.

Sirius was my best friend. And that's crazy, I know. He's my brother, and such a troublemaker. But our whole lives all we've done is look out for each other. And soon, we won't have to do that. And maybe Sirius will be accepted by my parents when I'm gone, maybe he'll be able to understand what they did was for the best.

After all, no body's going to remember me. I'm just Lyra Black. The Gryffindor girl that no body socializes with, the girl that's always alone.


	2. Train Rides

"Lyra," Sirius muttered and starts tugging me away from our parents and toward the Hogwarts Express, "C'mon."

"Sirius am I not allowed to say bye?" I asked softly.

Sirius gave me a disgruntled look, and I knew what he was thinking. 'You really think they care if you say bye or not?'

I sighed and Sirius kept dragging me through the crowd, dodging wizdarding families, muttering sorry whenever he'd accidentally run into a wizard or witch.

Sirius really didn't have a care. He'll plow you down if you're in his way. And people get in his way a lot. He was definitely a Black at heart.

Me on the other hand? Not so much. Not at all, actually.

"Are you riding in the same cart as us? Or sitting by yourself again?" Sirius asked sarcastically.

I opened my mouth to give him the same answer I always did. Alone. When a voice came from our left.

"If it isn't for the great Sirius Black!"

An arm went around my shoulder and the smell of peppermint and parchment reached my nose, making my nose twitch.

"And don't think I forgot, the_ lovely_ Lyra," James Potter smirked down at me, making me blush.

Sirius bellowed out a laugh, "Now's not the time to flirt with my baby sister, James."

James smiled cheekily, "Now's always the time to flirt with your baby sister. Am I right, Remus?"

I laughed softly and whispered to my brother, "Sirius you're older than me by a few minutes."

"But the main thing is, I'm still older than you," He smirked.

James Potter was my distant cousin, but then again all purebloods are related to each other in some way. He was also Sirius' best mate, and a giant flirt. He liked to flirt with me whenever he got the chance. Apparently it bugged Sirius. But in all honesty I'm pretty sure that Sirius wants me and James to get married. Even though he knows there's no possibility of that happening. Ever.

Remus Lupin's voice joined the conversation, "If you say so, James."

Remus was my Favorited out of all Sirius' friends. His voice was always calm, and the way he carried himself was kind of like how I did. He didn't want anybody to take notice of him, I didn't want anybody to take notice of me either.

I've always wanted to talk to Remus, but I've never really felt the need to. Not until now anyway. Something about him kept catching my eye.

Remus was staring at me with his calming, soft green eyes. They reminded me of the forest...

"How was your summer, Lyra?" His light brown hair swept over his forehead, falling in his eyes a bit.

"U-uhm it was okay," I stuttered nervously, "How about yours?"

Remus smiled softly, "Could have been better."

* * *

Sirius ended up making me sit with him and the boys in their cart, Peter Pettigrew joined us as well. I didn't like him, he seemed... Wrong. That was really the only way I could describe it.

"So little sister, what classes did you decide to take this year?"

I turned to look at Sirius, "Study Of Ancient Ruins and-" I paused, "I think Care Of Magical Creatures?"

"I took Divination," Sirius says and I gave him a confused look.

"Why on earth would you take that?" It was the first thing James had said since we got on the train.

Sirius grinned mischievously, "I also took Muggle Studies."

I stared at him, "You really want our parents to hate you."

Sirius grinned while Remus and James laughed, Peter sitting in the corner looking out the window, "You act like they don't already."

I scoffed and muttered returning to reading my transfiguration book, "They like you more than me."

It was silent in the compartment. Not awkwardly, just silent. Like nobody knew what to say at that point in time.

'_The werewolf is found worldwide. though it is believed to have originated in northern Europe. Humans turn into werewolves only when bitten,_' I read. '_There is no known cure, though recent developments in potion making have to a great extent alleviated the worst symptoms. Once a month_-'

"What are you reading there?"

I snapped the book shut with wide eyes and raised my eyes to meet the curious ones of Remus Lupin.

"Oh nothing. Just a Care Of Magical Creatures textbook. Not much fun..." I trailed off and fiddled with the pages of the book nervously.

Remus laugh was filled with mirth, "Took that class last year, was pretty good. I took it again this year. Kettleburn's a bit much though, I must say."

I smiled and chuckled a bit, thinking about the Care Of Magical Creatures professor, Silvanus Kettleburn. Due to the mans recklessness he only had one arm and one and half of a leg. Many incidents having something catching fire, or creatures on the loose.

"You can say that again."

Remus and I chatted for a bit until I returned to my book, while Sirius and James started planning all of the shenanigans they could get up to when arriving at Hogwarts. Peter was eating all the candy he got off the trolley.

Every once in awhile I could feel Remus' eyes on me. But I didn't dare look up.

Sighing, I fiddled with the corner of the page I was on, this was going to be a terrible school year. I could feel it.

* * *

"We should change," Sirius suggested and everyone nodded in agreement.

Grabbing my robes I cleared my throat, making the boys look at me. "Could you guys- uhm. Wait outside, please?"

"Oh. Oh, yeah of course, Lyra." James said and they cleared the compartment, moving into the hallway. I closed the curtains before letting a small breath escape me.

Removing my jumper I grimaced at my arm. The pale, jagged scar that twisted from my elbow up to my shoulder blade was thick and disgusting, healed years ago but never letting the skin return to its former pale, unmarred flesh as when I was young. I covered it up as much as I could but even if you squinted, and looked closely at the skin, it was still noticeable.

Shrugging my robe over my body I opened the compartment door, smiling thankfully at the boys for leaving they shuffled out of the narrow hallway and back into the compartment. They were all changed and ready to go.

The rest of the ride to Hogwarts was filled with Sirius' and James' whispering. About what, I'm not sure. But every once and a while they'd glace at me. A few times at Remus.

Sometimes I feel as if Sirius told them. But he wouldn't do that. He wouldn't betray me, and the Black name, like that. The Blacks would all be driven into the dirt, never to be respected again. They'd disown me, blame it all on me and burn me off the Blacks family tree, I'd never be heard from again.

As the train began to slow down, I heard the usual racket up and down the train as everyone scrambled to get their luggage and pets assembled, ready for departure.

Raising from my seat and tucking my book under my arm, I grabbed my luggage and exited the compartment. The sting of night air and smell of lake water entered my senses and I took a deep breath before exhaling with my eyes closed and a small smile on my face.

_This, is my home._


	3. Potions

To me, the first day back at Hogwarts is always exhausting. New first years, sorting hat, and everyone getting excited after not seeing their friends for a whole three months. It was exhausting having people screaming near me, all of the polite, "Hi Lyra how have you been, how was your summer?" When that person and I know they're just trying to be polite. I have one sort of friend here at Hogwarts with me, and I only got to see her briefly with me, and I only got to see her briefly in the Great Hall, both of our responsible prefects calling our houses to, "Come follow me to the common room, so that we can get unpacked."

Aisling Caoilainn was gorgeous. She was tall, with white-gold hair. Her blue eyes could stop anyone in their tracks, and a glare from her could probably fry someone on their spot. She was soft spoken, quiet and shy. With pale skin and rosy cheeks. Her upturned nose made everyone think she was snotty, and her pink cupid bow lips complete with thin eyebrows made her near irresistible. Almost all the boys wanted her, including some girls. But she was shy, didn't like attention being on her. And if she doesn't approach you, you don't approach her. She can be terribly nasty when she needs to. She has approximately four friends, me being one of them.

She and I aren't the closest of friends, we don't even know each others favorite food. We mostly just meet up in the library to have a chat every now and then. We were both loners (though she was a beautiful loner), and loners get along. We don't need to be together all the time to be content with our friendship, it is what it is. We're just there for each other when need be.

The bellow of a fifth year muggleborn named Aiden Calder drew me away from my thoughts and I sighed. The boys continued being obnoxiously loud behind me while I settled back into the common room sofa, the warm fire from the fireplace relieving me of my headache temporarily.

Sirius had run up to the boys dorm after the dinner in the great hall, he had wanted to keep me company but I declined, after three times of me begging him to _leave me be_, he did, climbing the stairs with Remus, James, and Peter trailing after him. I pretended not to notice Remus' lingering glance when I shifted on the couch to get more comfortable.

My body was aching tonight, my bones creaking against each other, muscles wound up tight against each other, still not yet healed from the previous self inflicted wounds.

Grimacing, I reached for my journal which was at the other end of the sofa. Opening it to a new page I started to write in it-

_ Sept, 1/1976_

_The pain in my legs is getting worse, my arms are sort of numb now. The cuts on my thighs and stomach healed around yesterday, they took longer to heal this time. And it's getting a lot harder to control, a lot more wild as the years go by. I have a long, thick cut doing down my spine that's still in the middle of healing. It had a thin layer of new skin over it, _

_First day of fifth year and I already have a permanent migraine. Sirius is bugging me about not being social like always, and I think he has a crush on Aisling. Though he would never admit it, he spoke about her the whole summer._

_It's curious. All the other guys in the school stare at Aisling whenever she's near, but they never actually talk about her when she's not around. Sirius didn't see her the whole summer, yet he was talking about her the whole time. He never asked directly, though. He only hinted at her, kind of nudged the conversation in that direction until we were suddenly talking about what she was doing, if she was visiting her mother in France like everyone said. 'Heard from that one friend of yours?' He'd usually ask. He'd always try to make it seem like he was teasing me. Oh, but I know he wasn't._

_It feels like this year is going to be different, though I'm not sure why. Mother reminded me the whole summer what I have to do when my sixteenth birthday arrives. It's less then a year away. I've known since I was four what I have to do, and I should have excepted it by now, right? In all honesty I'm terrified. I wanna scream and rant to my mother how 'life isn't fair' and yell at her that this is all her fault in the first place, so why do I get the worst end of it? But I'm not like that. I don't blame my mother like Sirius does. She may be bitter, but I understand that whatever she does for Sirius, Regulus and I is for the best. She can't be punished for a little mistake she made. I've made a million. _

_I really wish I had someone to talk to this about, other than Sirius. I've come to realize writing your thoughts down does not help get them off your mind. Because now I have a documentation of every bad thought and thing I've ever done in this damn book. Maybe I could talk to Aisling. Actually- scratch that, I know for a fact that's never going to happen, And I'm perfectly okay with that to be honest. I don't like dropping my issues on someone else' shoulders._

Sighing, I snapped my journal closed. Classes were tomorrow, I had History Of Magic at 9am tomorrow. Worst way to stat a Monday.

Standing up, I grimaced at the shock of pain that ran through my joins, before turning and marching up the stairs to the girls dormitory.

* * *

The giggles of the other fifth year girls awoke me in the morning.

Lacey Meridan looked over at me distastefully after I had sat up in my bed, "Breakfast's starting int ten minutes. Might wanna get up."

"Thanks."

Lacey has had a huge crush on Sirius since first year. Even though he continuously turns her down time after time, she never gives up.

Getting ready as quickly I could, I made my way to the Great Hall with only my book bag to keep me company on the walk there. Sirius, Remus, and James were all sat at the Gryffindor table, James and Sirius lent close together. Most likely plotting another prank. Remus was sitting back and laughing every once and awhile at something James and Sirius said.

I didn't realize I was staring until Remus and I eyes' met, his dancing with laughter. He smiled a bit at me and tipped his head in my direction. His eyes asked me a silent question, inviting me to come over and sit with him. Giving my head a slight shake I walked towards the empty end of the table.

* * *

_Add 2 Mistletoe Berries to your cauldron  
_

Adding the 2 Mistletoe Berries to Aisling and I's cauldron I studied the potion color for a minute, making sure they were the proper color.

"I really hate this class," an Irish accent cut into my thoughts.

"Well if you don't let me concentrate on this potion, we'll fail this class," I muttered back as I turned towards Aisling.

"Don' forget to stir it," Aisling scolded, making me scoff before turning back to the potion.

"Clockwise?"

"Anti."

Nodding I stirred the potion anti-clockwise, making it turn a teal-color.

"Wave your wand and we're done," I muttered to Aisling, and switched positions with her.

She waved her wand and grinned, making all the boys turn and stare at her. "Done!" She giggled.

She turned to me after turning the temperature down, "You really are bollocks at potions, you know that?"

I huffed, slouching in my seat. "Well I just did that potion perfectly fine."

"It's an antidote for common poisons. I'd hope you can do that perfectly fine."

Rolling my eyes I stared up at her, "Need I remind you you're absolutely rubbish at Transfiguration? I've almost-" I lowered my voice, "I've almost mastered my Animagus and you can't turn a bird into a cup."

She stuck her tongue out at me, "No need to be childish, Lyra."

"Says the one sticking out her tongue at me in a very mature way."

She scooted back in her chair, slouching slightly, with a gloomy look on her face. Still managing to look effortlessly graceful while doing it. "I hate this class. I wan' to be a potions master and all, but sometimes this class really mess' with me skin. Do you think I could be allergic to some of the ingredients? I was gonna ask ma mere to buy me some professional gloves but she said it'll pass eventually-"

"Ms. Caoilainn, are you and Ms. Black done with your potion? Perfect again, I presume?" Horance Slughorn said as he approached our desk.

Aisling brightened considerably, almost making the classroom glow with her smile, "Yes, Professor Slughorn."

I sat back and watched as she rattled off about the potion and how it works. Aisling was a teachers pet, but she didn't mean to be. She just liked to make people happy. And sometimes other people don't understand that.

Her and I were alike in so many ways, I'm surprised we don't hate each other.

* * *

**Authors Note: Lyra is not harming herself in an self harm way. There are no trigger warnings to be put in this story.**

**~Ary-Gryphyn**


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